I can only count to nine. I did this by following the suggestion of my meditation guide who advised me to count each of my breathing cycles, and to start again when I reached 10.
However, when it came time to visualize this ten, I converted 1 + 0 = 1, then 1 + 1 equals 2.
1, 10, 19, 28, 37, 46, 55, 64, 73, 82, 91, 100
2, 11, 20, 29…
19 is the mirror of 91.
101 is the cousin of 2.
These are mind games, a numerology that means nothing to scientists. My science doesn’t care. Pseudo-calculation reminds me of the power of 0, alone and unique. We can count all the quantities, even those that are coloured with infinite complexities. There is only one nothingness, only one ignorance that is unspeakable because it is incomprehensible, beyond reach. Even if, in the end, we think we have to name it, and then forget that naming is quantifying. There would therefore be only one God, for those called, counted for centuries, were nothing more than wanderings and misunderstandings. Now that we know there is only one, we use violence to preserve our identity. What pity. It is also a question of our certainties and our vain policies. Once we have found a reasoning for them, we think we have to barricade them, regiment them.
The 0 is scary.
Counting to nine, written in full, is pretty, because nine suggests that it is new (nine in French is the same word as “neuf”, new), started over and that we can afford to reinvent .
I will be told that we are not making strong children with this mathematics and that science has propelled us to the Moon and soon to Mars.
We forget that science allows zero in its calculations, because only science gives it all its freedom to the human mind…
But I’m rambling, sitting comfortably in my bed. Outside, there are millions of snowflakes in addition to the trillions of stars I miss.
Breathing in, breathing out, 1
Breathing in, breathing out, 2
Breathing in, breathing out, 3
Breathing in, breathing out, 4
Breathing in, breathing out, 5
Breathing in, breathing out, 6
Breathing in, breathing out, 7
Breathing in, breathing out, 8
Breathing in, breathing out, 9
Breathe in, breathe out, 1….